defy.

Think about it.. We’re pretty good at defying things: Whenever we speed, we are defying the law. Children defy their parents. New technologies allow us to defy gravity. 

But as I listened and worshipped to Hillsong’s “Revolution”, I was convicted. It goes..

one generation, living salvation,

here we go!

seeing revival, we will defy all that holds up back from you!

As I sang the last line, I questioned whether or not I was seriously defying everything that was holding me back from Jesus. I realized that I have no problems defying things such as the speed limit. So why, if I have truly seen and tasted revival, am I not defying the things that are holding me back from the one who made the universe, yet has time to be so in love with me?

Think about this… There are things in our life that we are holding on to, afraid to give up because we know we are weak and they give us a false sense of strength. 

But I want to encourage you to let go of those things. Defy them in the name of Jesus. Today, let’s cast everything aside that is holding us back and give God all of us. Experience his fullness.

Let me tell you one of my biggest fears.. that you are going to see Jesus face-to-face and experience all of his glory, but then be sent away to a place where holiness is completely absent.

Allow me to put Matthew 25:31-46 in my own words…

“Jesus our King, on the day of his glory, will divide up all people, placing his sheep to the right and the goats to the left. Turning to his sheep, he will say: come live in heaven with me! For I was hungry. And you gave me something to eat. I was thirsty. And you gave me something to drink. I was a stranger. And you invited me in. I needed clothes. And you gave them to me. I was sick. And you took care of me. I was in prison. And you came to visit me. But those sheep will tell Jesus that they never saw him hungry or in prison. And the King will say indeed, you did because what you did for the least of these, you did it for me!

Then he will turn to the goats, and tell them to leave his presence. He will say:  I was hungry. But you gave me nothing to eat. I was thirsty. But you gave me nothing to drink. I was a stranger. But you did not invite me in. I needed clothes. But you did not give me any. I was sick and in prison. But you did not take care of me. Then the goats will ask Jesus when they ever saw him hungry or in prison. And then the King will reply, whatever you didn’t do for one of the least of these, you didn’t do for me.”

Seriously, does it get anymore black and white than that??

stand unafraid, all the good souls.

How can you expect to win this war when you are too afraid to fight? Are you too afraid to fight? Anberlin

I believe that we do ourselves more harm than others do. Does that make sense? When it comes to oppression or discouragement, I believe that most of it is internal and self-inflicted. So many times we underestimate ourselves and the immense power we are given to change this world. When we look at our lost and dying world, its so overwhelming. And naturally, as Christians, God calls us to chase out the evil and heal the hurt (in his name). But when we are met with that nudging, we often place inhibitors on ourselves with thoughts like “God can’t possibly want me to do do that, I’m too young” or “I’ve screwed up so many times, its not worth it.” Ahh.. We know the the world is dying, but we are too afraid to fight. But I want to encourage you otherwise!!

“Truly, truly, I say to you, whoever believes in me will also do the works that I do; and greater works than these he will do, because I am going to the Father.“   John 14:12

This is so incredible! I am so confident in these words that I would be willing to put my life on the line. Of course I am going to take everything in the Bible as truth, but Jesus backs this up twice.. “Truly, truly..” How can we be afraid or discouraged? We can and will receive the power of Jesus Christ as we fight in his name… The power that holds victory over death!! What more do we need? So today, stand up and rebuke the lies that you are not good enough and that you cannot change the world. Don’t be too afraid to fight.

wedding dress

“If you could love me as a wife, and for my wedding gift–  your life. Should that be all I’ll ever need, or is there more I’m looking for?”

Ahh this song speaks such an incredible, unsettling truth to me about “Christians”. If we really claim that we are lovers of Christ, we need to humbly live with greater expectations for ourselves and change the way we love.

last words.

Wow, these could be the last words I ever post. Or they could be the last words you ever read. Geez. That makes me stop and think…

Just in case these in fact are the last words I will ever write, I want to choose them and set them apart. Sure, last words are eventually forgotten. But these words are the song of my heart and its by these words I wish to be remembered.

But maybe these aren’t my last words. Maybe they’re yours. You may never read anything ever again. So sing it with me…

Life is not right until You split the sky.
The Spirit and the Bride say, “Come”
We long for the day
when You make all things new.
We want to be with You…

I just gotta say something I’ve been observing… As the “Salt of the earth”, we’ve been setting the bar REALLY low. Where’s the Gospel? I’m inspired by the church in Acts. Filled with passion and power. 3,000 baptisms in one day!! If they did it, why can’t we? There’s millions of people out there dying in darkness yet most days, our hearts sit pretty comfortable.

Did you know that in America alone 2,540,644 people die every year? So who are we to think that we won’t be one of them? Who are we to think our unsaved neighbor isn’t going to be one of them?

This reality must render a response. The Spirit that conquered death is the same Spirit that lives in us. So what are we afraid of? Time is slipping away and we’ve got nothing to lose.

God, break our hearts for what breaks yours.

double edged sword.

Do me a favor.. Before anymore words come out of your mouth, please, really think about them.

The words of the reckless pierce like swords,
       but the tongue of the wise brings healing.  Proverbs 12:18

Are they going to hurt or heal? There really is no gray area.. You either speak life or death. There’s not an in-between. It just kills me when I see people throw words around like they don’t mean a thing. They don’t even care. It kills me when I do it. You can’t take things back once you say them.

Our words carry so much power.. You have the power to heal or hurt. Encourage or depress. Strengthen or break down. Honor or disrespect… SPEAK RESPONSIBLY…

samaritan.

My Hero: MLK.

So much power and authority packed into one man. Convicted by the truth of the Spirit, he fearlessly sought justice. He moves me. So much progress in the integration of our society can be attributed to his obedience and audacity. Whatever I do in my life, I want to leave that impact. He died for his cause. I’m determined to be that passionate.

But more than the impact he made regarding racism, he was devoted to fighting injustice. In my opinion, that is one of the most admirable marks a man can have. We should all be like that. MLK once said, “He who passively accepts evil is as much involved in it as he who helps to perpetrate it. He who accepts evil without protesting against it is really cooperating with it.”

Pow! Does that hit you like it does me? Join with me. Devote yourself to seeking justice. Protest–through prayer. Its powerful, and I stand confident that God will move against injustice through our prayers. Pray for the women in India being forced into prostitution. The Asians caught up in the caste system. The slaves toiling off the coast in Africa. Russians silenced by corruption. The victims in Darfur. Oppression caused by gangs. Children of addicts. SEEK JUSTICE. You’re finished reading this, obviously you have time on your hands. Say a prayer.

Speak up for the people who have no voice, for the rights of all the down-and-outers. Speak out for justice! Stand up for the poor and destitute! Proverbs 31:9

 If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing. If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing.  1 Corinthians 13:1-3

Wow. Not much commentary needed for this. Think about it…

the splendor of the king

• the vastness of the ocean & the wonderful rage of its waves
• watching the sun as it rises & sets
• holding an infant & feeling the fragility of life
• pushing through a several mile run
• the incredible power behind a hurricane
• standing before more than 200 kids, over taken their purest faith as they worship with me
• an addict becoming sober

This list could go on forever, filled with all of the things that make me get down on my knees, leaving me without words. They speak of God’s splendor. My King is full of majesty and it is everywhere. It is powerful, without limitations. It conquered death and set me free. 

   To you, O God, belong the greatness and the might,
      the glory, the victory, the majesty, the splendor;
   Yes! Everything in heaven, everything on earth;
      the kingdom all yours! You’ve raised yourself high over all. 2 Chronicles 29:11

Soak this in. God is glorious and his splendor is limitless, so worship him for it!!

Praise Adonai

Who is like him? The Lion and the Lamb, seated on the throne. Mountains bow down, and every ocean roars to the Lord of Hosts. Praise Adonai, from the rising of the sun, til the end of every day. Praise Adonai, all the nations of the earth, all the angels and the saints– sing praise.

I love this song. It puts me in my place. I must admit, I sometimes feel lost, but in this song, I find myself…

I find myself in his mercy– Why would Jesus even want to hear me when I am the reason he chose to be crucified? That’s incredible… Mercy unending on someone so undeserving.

I find myself in his grace– A sinner’s voice is made beautiful.

Life happens so quickly. As a new year makes its entrance, I just wonder, what happened to the previous? How did the years ever become so short? Day after day is filled with assignments, commitments, and responsibilities.. and that doesn’t even include a real job. Tell me, does it begin to slow down?

Well recently, it all seemed to freeze. And not by the way you might expect it to. It was by rather simple means, actually. I was in conversation with a friend–who, might I add, I look up to– when he asked, “So, where do you see yourself in five years?”

I’m not sure why, but this question hit me with quite some force. I couldn’t come up with an answer. And if you know me well, you’d know that I hate that. Why? Well, one of the things that I despise the most is wasting time or falling behind. Ideally, I would like to know everything that I am going to be someday, so that I can get ready for it  NOW. You know, so that I wouldn’t be doing things that would hold no relevance to what I will be later on in life.

Its kinda like this… If you knew that you were going to run a race that you have never run before, you would not want to wait until the very last opportunity to train for it. You would probably start as soon as you found out, and then you would properly train yourself.

So.. that’s me. I really want to know what I am supposed to do, so I can get ready for it now. I want to do it with excellence.

But how will I ever know even know what it is I’m supposed to do? I’ve heard of some people who say that when they were young, the Holy Spirit spoke to their hearts and revealed what they were called to do. (Yeah, I know you might look at this and say that all of us are just called to love Jesus. End of story. But I mean specifically. Personally, what am I supposed to do with the strengths and interests that God made in me?)

Still caught up on this question, I faced another internal issue (this post is long so just bear with me). What if all of the things that  currently consume my schedule won’t even attribute or hold relevance to what I will be someday? What if I am just wasting time? Perhaps I am doing the wrong kind of ‘conditioning’.

If you haven’t noticed, I like to ask “What if…?” And in my case, that habit normally tends to favorable, revealing new possibilities and ideas, yet this time, it caused me quite some unrest. I was so overwhelmed by these thoughts that all stemmed from one simple question.   However, I found Light in the Word. I found who I want to be someday, who I see myself as in a few years:

One who relys on the Lord alone: In you, LORD, I have taken refuge(verse 1 ) Be my rock of refuge, to which I can always go; …For you are my rock and my fortress(verse 2) From birth I have relied on you(verse 6) But you are my strong refuge(verse 7)

One who has hope in the Savior: For you have been my hope, Sovereign LORD, my confidence since my youth(verse 5) As for me, I will always have hope(verse 14)

One whose words always bring glory to God:My mouth is filled with your praise, declaring your splendor all day long(verse 8 ) I will praise you more and more(verse 14)My mouth will tell of your righteous deeds, of your saving acts all day long(verse 15 )I will come and proclaim your mighty acts, Sovereign LORD; I will proclaim your righteous deeds, yours alone(verse 16)…And to this day I declare your marvelous deeds(verse 17)I will praise you with the harp…I will sing praise to you with the lyre(verse 22)My lips will shout for joy when I sing praise to you(verse 23)My tongue will tell of your righteous acts all day long(verse 24)

Most of all, One who has been set free:I, whom you have redeemed(verse 23)

Each one of these excerts were found in Psalm 71, where David vividly paints out who I want to be someday. There is not a profession or job title that I can yet put my finger on. But whatever it may be, it will be alright as long I can exhibit the beautiful life described above. There is nothing greater that I can do to prepare myself than to love Jesus with all I am, and that is my plan for this year. I know that if I do just that, no time will be wasted and I will be fully prepared for what will come my way in five years.

So, 2009=no worries.

Also, 2014=no worries.:)

Jesus, I love you. I love you so much and I want to be exactly who you designed me to be. As I seek you, please continue to guide me. Your hand is perfect, so please hold mine and lead me where you want to go. I will follow. I don’t deserve for you to care for me, but thank you for being forever unconditional.

love,

joy,

peace,

patience,

kindness,

goodness,

faithfulness,

gentleness,

self-control?

Jesus says: Be perfect…..

“So be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect.“        Matthew 5:48

This verse really caught my eye. How come? Well, here’s something about me: I love perfection. I only like to accept things that are good and things that are right. And because of that, I end up putting unnecessary pressure on myself and others.

Now let me tell you something else about myself: I fall so short in every single part of my life. I really do. There is no escaping it– nothing I have done or will do can ever come close. Man, do I hate it, but that’s what I have deeply realized by studying this verse. Sure, we all know that we are sinners and we have all prayed the same prayer, but wow… To really know that every single thing I do never even comes close to all God is. How awesome.

YES! That’s it! My realization previously stated– I think that is what Jesus wanted to achieve with this command. He didn’t  say it expecting me to really obey it.. He knows I can’t. But then why would he even say that?

He was commanding me to do something that I will forever be incapable of. That is so glorious. Why? Because how else can I realize my absolute need of grace if I am able to perfectly accomplish the ways of my Father??

I believe Jesus said this so that I could look into my life and see how off I really am. To see that no matter how hard I try, I can never even skim the surface of this command. But that is so awesome!!! Without this command and realizing that I can’t do it, grace has no meaning!! It is simply not needed.

This impossible command is so amazing to me. It revealed my incredible need for grace. I can’t even come close to being like my Father, even though I so desperately long to be. But that’s ok with me now– I’m in love with his grace.

Jesus says: “Me first!”

But put God’s kingdom first. Do what he wants you to do. Then all of those things will also be given to you.     Matthew 6:33

Before anything more is said, I would just like to point out that this is not a suggestion. This wasn’t said for us to do maybe only if we felt like it. Jesus put it clearly: “Seek me and my Father’s kingdom first, and then align your life with his will“ (which, by the way, is not going to happen all at once..)

So when I read this, I am taken back to a book I just finished, The Shack. I read it mostly because of the great recommendations I heard from others, however I am sorry to say I don’t share the same feelings. Although it was a great story, there are many ideas in the book that I do not particularly agree with. Yet there was one theme repeated over and over in the book that really shook my heart: dependence.

It was repeated over and over throughout the plot– Mack really could not do anything without Jesus, Papa(God), or Sarayu(Holy Spirit). Every time Mack would start to sway towards independence, it was proven that his motives and ideologies and reasoning were wrong.

Without first seeking God and his kingdom, Mack moved farther and farther from the place of divine union that was originally created by his Maker. Although that place was never out of reach for Mack, each time he put on independence, he became a little bit more blind than before, and that place could not be seen as easily.

But every time Mack would recognize his dependence on God, the reverse effect would happen– bit by bit, the blinders on his eyes would come off, and he could see the beautiful union that was available. He was able to see what was originally designed for him and how God was absolutely hungry for it.

This theme represented by the book very much applies to us– we are not independent. Looking only to ourselves for strength, answers, etc. gets us further away from the place God wants to share with us. Many times I fail to turn from this, but it seems oh so simple.. Jesus says to seek first his kingdom. Seek him and his Father first. Above all. It is such an easy concept, but why is it so hard to carry out? I believe that the second part of the command– to do what he wants me to do– will be the effect once I continually seek God. As I faithfully seek Christ above all else, his will will (ha) become more and more plain to my heart.

So today, I am going to seek my Lord first. My Maker and Creator. The One whose hands crafted my body, and the One who painted the sun. The Great I Am. My perfect Lover… Only sounds logical, doesn’t it?:)

This is my declaration of dependence, all for You. I love you, Jesus.

Jesus says: Sell what you own? Store up treasures only in heaven? What??

“Little flock, do not be afraid. Your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom. 33|Sell what you own. Give to those who are poor. Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out. Put away riches in heaven that will not be used up. There, no thief can come near it. There, no moth can destroy it. 34|Your heart will be where your riches are.“          Luke 12:32-34

“Don’t store up treasures on earth! Moths and rust can destroy them, and thieves can break in and steal them. 20|Instead, store up your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy them, and thieves cannot break in and steal them. 21|Your heart will always be where your treasure is.“      Matthew 6:19-21

Hmm… These are hard. I spent the last couple of days trying to digest and understand the commands present, but I was only left with questions…

-What did Jesus mean by this? No doubt, he said it for a reason. But what was it?

-We cannot literally ‘put away riches in heaven’, so does that mean we are not supposed to take the rest of the verse literally? Was this said in some kind of context that was only relevant 2000 years ago? Is this a representation of symbolism?

-Regardless of the context, wouldn’t everything be better off if we managed to sell everything we own and give to the poor? What bad could come out of that?

-How are we supposed to store up our treasures in heaven?

-What are “treasures” anyways?

Now affirming 2 Timothy 3:16, I know that Luke 12:32-34 and Matthew 6:19-21 are useful in teaching what is true, correcting our mistakes, making our lives whole again, and training us to do what is right. I know those verses mean something, but I just can’t figure out what.

So if you have any kind of insight, drop a comment for me. Let me know your take on these commands. Jesus said them for a reason, and I want to know why.

Jesus says: Don’t worry. I got your back.

“Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God. Trust in me also.” John 14:1

That verse comes out of the New International Reader’s Version, which is my preference and what I have been using, but I like the different spin the Message Bible puts on it–

“Don’t let this throw you. You trust God, don’t you? Trust me.” John 14:1

Ok, now allow me to show you the gravity contained in this command. Here’s the previous verse-

“Really? You’ll lay down your life for me? The truth is that before the rooster crows, you’ll deny me three times.“ John 13:38 (also from the Message)

Wow! So here are the details– Jesus was hanging with the twelve. He was alluding to the crucifixion that was to come, talking about ‘leaving’ them and going to a place where they cannot follow. Peter, being ever so zealous, asks why he can’t go with. He exclaims that he would even lay down his life for Jesus. And Jesus replies with a killer answer. Really? You’ll lay down your life for me? The truth is that before the rooster crows, you’ll deny me three times.

Even though Peter loved Jesus, and sincerely wanted to follow him, Jesus knew he wouldn’t. And he was straightforward with Peter, too. He told it like it was. But my hope is in this: Jesus said it was ok. He said you are going to mess up. But it’s ok! Stay determined! You trust God, right? Trust me, its ok. And that’s not just a suggestion. Jesus is telling us to do this.

In the next verses, he assures us that there is always plenty of space for us in his Father’s house, and that he will faithfully lead us to that good, good home. Wow! This command is so redemptive. It brings me so much hope. Sometimes I feel so unworthy when I know I mess up, but Jesus doesn’t want me to feel like that. Like with Peter, Jesus knows exactly how and when I am going to fail him, but he says to trust in him, and he will make all things good. Amen.

 

Jesus, thanks for your perfect grace. It’s so perfect and consistent yet I don’t trust in you enough. Strengthen me, Lord. I love your faithfulness– thank you for being ready to forgive me when I ask. Thank you for the hope I have in you and your redemption. My hope is in you and only you. I can’t wait until you finally lead me to your house. I love you.

Jesus says: Don’t underestimate children.

Before you read this, please read the page titled ” Jesus says…” That will help you understand what the purpose of this post is and what I’m aiming for.

 

“When Jesus saw this, he was angry. He said to his disciples, “Let the little children come to me. Don’t keep them away. God’s kingdom belongs to people like them.“  Mark 10:14

So no posts this weekend like I would have hoped, but it gave me plenty of time to really think this one over and focus in. Whenever I read this, I am taken back to Camp Kulaqua…

You see, I went to my very first GFC church camp this summer, and I got to share a cabin with 8 third grade girls… Talk about fun. Well, I don’t think I will ever forget the time when they all came against me, each with a shaving cream bottle in hand. I had that stuff stuck in my ears for days. Or the many times we all found ourselves standing on top of our table, screaming and shaking because a spider had just crawled out from the couch. I would always become a super hero when I defeated the bug with a sneaker.

But the moment that will remain most engraved in my memory happened on the last night of camp. As I was walking with the girls back to my cabin, little Megan grabbed my hand, and started to slow down. Eventually, she came to a stop. Still holding my hand, this seven year old looked at me with all seriousness and said, “While we were singing, my eyes got all watery and my throat got sore. I wasn’t sad, though. I think it was Jesus.”

Whoa. Right then and there, my world stood still as I struggled to take a breath. I couldn’t say a word back to her. I don’t even think I could explain the purity that she had in her voice. I was completely shocked.

Why was I so shocked? Well, there are a few things that you need to know about Megan. Whenever my group was late for lunch, it was because Megan defied me and refused to leave the waterslide. Or whenever I was settling disputes within the group, it was because Megan had provoked somebody to annoyance. Or whenever there were tears, it was because Megan was not getting her way.

Needless to say, Megan was the difficult one of the bunch. She constantly went against my authority and would never sit quiet during our devotionals. So from the beginning, my first impression of Megan was not very promising. I looked at her and thought that there was no way that child will walk away from this camp with a new understanding of Jesus. And as a result of my judgment, I spent less time praying and discussing the sermons with her. I really didn’t make an outstanding effort to boost her relationship with Christ.

However, in the end, I got to see Megan be moved by the Spirit.

 

When Jesus said this, people were bringing their children to be close to Jesus, and as they came nearer, the disciples tried to send them away. Now I would like to imagine these kids as typical– sticky, loud, and silly. So the disciples thought they had every reason to send them away. Although I did not try to physically stop Megan from coming close to Jesus, I did something of equal offense. Rather, I made no effort to get her closer. I seriously underestimated her. Now that I look back, I did not take her seriously. And I think that just the action of doing nothing is as bad as physically stopping her. I could have done something, but I didn’t. I think that it makes Jesus just as angry as he was with the disciples when he sees us look at kids and say, nah, they wouldn’t ever understand that, so I’m not going to tell them. Or, no, that child is too hyper for me to do a devotional with.

Maybe you aren’t connecting with what I’m trying to say, but if you are around children as much as I am, then I bet you understand. Often times, I look back and I can see where I was not intentional with a child because I figured that they were too wild or disrespectful or even too young, just like Megan. But I wonder how different the whole week of camp might have been if I pushed through with Megan, instead of judging her.

Over the course of this weekend, I got to hang with about 200 kids, and I became a lot more aware. I saw how my mind tended to underestimate them, and how unintentional I was with certain kids who were not the most well-behaved. So by really seeing how I have disobeyed this command, it has challenged me. I am sorrowful but motivated. I don’t want to have any more experiences like I did with Megan, where I wasted time because of my predispostions.

Well, such a long post for a simple command. Hope you were challenged, too.

Jesus says: Serve with modesty and humility.

Before you read this, please read the page titled ” Jesus says…” That will help you understand what the purpose of this post is and what I’m aiming for.

 

“Be careful not to do ‘good works’ in front of others. Don’t do them to be seen by others. If you do, your Father in heaven will not reward you. 2|When you give to needy people, do not announce it by having trumpets blown. Do not be like those who only pretend to be holy. They announce what they do in the synagogues and on the streets. They want to be honored by others. What I’m about to tell you is true. They have received their complete reward. 3|When you give to the needy, don’t let your left hand know what your right hand is doing. 4|Then your giving will be done secretly. Your Father will reward you. He sees what you do secretly.”     Matthew 6:1

This command is pretty simple. I believe Jesus is telling me to serve for the sake of others. He is telling me to give to the needy so that his (not ‘my’) love can be shown… Not so I can become a saint… Not so I can wear a halo up top on my head. No. He is telling me to serve 100% for the sake of needy and the needy alone. If I am really serving 100%, there’s no room for even an ounce of anything else. Not for myself or my ego or my pride. Otherwise, any other kind of serving that is done even a little selfishly is not seen by God, and is counted as invalid.

ouch!

 

Jesus, I want to be like you. I want to be like the selfless servant you are. I repent for all of the times when I was self-seeking in the ways I served. I am so sorry. I surrender my pride to you and I am trusting in you to show me how to be truly humble. Although you served as if you were the lowest, Jesus, you are the greatest.  I love you and all of your perfect ways.

Amen.

Nothing is said better than when it comes from God…

So last night, I was upset about something that happened, and I was just totally dwelling on the negative. I couldn’t shake it off either. I had allowed my mind to go to far, thinking way to into the matter to the point where I couldn’t sleep. So I just laid in my bed for hours… The house was really quite… And that’s when I heard something…

(But it wasn’t like I audibly heard anything– but I through my convictions, this is what happened:)

I felt God saying, “Seriously? You think you are so bummed out? Then you must not know me. You must not know my neverending mercy, steady love, impeccable justice, and perfect will. Me and my kingdom are so big, and you and your worries are incredibly small. So don’t even go there.”

Whoa!! Did you catch that?? I just got completely owned by the Lord. It felt like I had all of the breath knocked out of me, and all I could say was… amen.

 

Wow, Lord. I am amazed by you and your faithfulness. Thanks for still convicting me when I am wrong. You are incredible for all you do. There is no one like you. Thank you, Jesus. I love you.  

Jesus says: Love others just as much as you love yourself.

Before you read this, please read the page titled ” Jesus says…” That will help you understand what the purpose of this post is and what I’m aiming for.

 

“And here is the second one. ‘Love your neighbor as you love yourself.’ There is no commandment more important than these.”      Mark 12:31

Just like the previous verse, this command is not conditional. Its not saying ‘Love your neighbor only if you can still get what you want.’ In a command like this, its easy for me to get caught up in the ‘only if’s…‘ I will love only if (fill in the blank).

But instead, this command, as in the previous one, is unconditional. We have to do this no matter what.

This happened just the other day:

I found a ton of Starbursts, way more than one person should have. So, I decided to claim them as mine. I had the big pile sitting on my desk in my room when my sister walked in. Immediately, her eyes went straight to the candy and excitement spread across her face. She rushed over to my desk and said “Ooh, can I have some?”

And you know what I tell her?

Only the pink ones.

I know that doesn’t really seem like a big deal. Its just candy, right? But you see, pink Starbursts are my least favorite. I know that my sister loves yellow. But I was only thinking about myself and what I wanted.

Man!! I know that it was only candy, yet something tells me that doesn’t matter to Jesus. He doesn’t write it off as ‘no big deal’. Through my actions, I pretty much told my sister (who, by the way, is wonderful and deserves every color of Starburst) that I care more about me than I do her. I love myself more than I love her. Would you ever actually verbally tell somebody that? Of course not! I never would!

But I blatantly contradicted this verse. I made the choice not to love my sister as my self. Although I didn’t verbally say it, I told my sister that I was more important. Everything that I am told by the world tells me that I am not wrong in what I did. The world justifies the fact that I only allowed my sister to have the pink ones and tells me its ok, since after all, they were mine. However, Jesus told me to be the other way around. He told me to love others just as I love myself.

Well, I am really challenged by this verse. It challenges me in the small things, like Starbursts. And it challenges me to love with all that I am capable of. Too many times do I base my love for people on conditions. And too many times to I try and love on my own ability. But I am going to seek agapao, the kind of love generated by the Holy Spirit. Today, I am going to try and love people, in both big ways and small.

Jesus, you ARE love. The more I know you, the more I will know how to love. Thanks for being such a steady love. As I seek you, please overflow my heart with your kind of love. Convict me of the times I didn’t love people whole-heartedly and unconditionally. I am so self-seeking, but you are not. Show me how you would love. Thanks for your unfailing mercy and second chances. You are amazing.

Jesus says: Love God.

Before you read this, please read the previous post or the page titled ” Jesus says…” That will help you understand what the purpose of this post is and what I’m aiming for.

 

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.        Luke 12:30

You know what I like about this verse? There are no conditions written in it.

You see, one thing I have been pursuing lately is being unconditional. Serving no matter what is going on around me. Being joyful no matter what is happening. Worshipping no matter what I feel like… Loving God no matter when or what.

This command has no catches in it. No “only if’s…” Its unconditional. We are supposed to do it no matter what.

One way I like to go about reading scriptures in the New Testament is cross-referencing with Wuest’s Word Studies in the Greek New Testament. Its a pretty simple study guide that brings a different perspective on the verse’s language and meaning. It offers a history of the culture and and goes into rich details of what the verse meant at the time.

But of all of the neat info the word study could give me, there was one thing that stuck out the most:

The Greek word that was used for love is agapao, which means love generated by the Holy Spirit and that lives in the heart of a yielded saint.

Love generated by the Spirit, not me. Its no wonder I always fall short of loving God– its because I’m trying to find that love within my self. I try to love on my own ability.

So today, I’m going to try to obey this command by loving God on the Spirit’s accord… Not mine.

Jesus, I want to love you, so please, show me how to make my heart tender to the Spirit. Lead me in your love so that I can give it back in return. Thank you for being my God.

obedience.

Obedience is such a tough thing. It seems like in the end when you have proudly completed something, you look back and realize that you weren’t even fully obedient in the first place. You know what I mean?  Thoughts like, ‘Oh man! Why didn’t I yield to that??’

So, lately I have been wrestling with this: If you love me, you will obey what I command. (John 14:15)

Do you kinda get that “oops!” feeling? A little pang of remorse? When I read that verse, it makes my body ache with guilt. My obedience should be unconditional, but there are many times when I base my actions only on the moment. If it flows with what I’m doing, then sure! I’ll obey! However, that’s not the kind of obedience Jesus is referring to…

But STOP. Let’s get one thing straight… There is a big difference between remorse and condemnation. I don’t want you to feel condemnation. Consider this:

Remorse is moral anguish arising from repentance for past misdeeds. [Thank you, American Heritage Dictionary]

Condemnation is strong censure(an expression of strong disapproval or harsh criticism). [Once again, thanks.]

Got that? Condemnation is not of the Spirit. How can “a strong censure” stem from love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness or self-control? It can’t. But ”moral anguish arising from repentance” comes from the faithfulness of the Spirit– although we messed up, the Spirit still remains faithful to gently convict us to feel remorse for what we’ve done. Therefore, assuming that you and I both believe and love the Trinity, we know that Jesus did not say this to condemn us. Or for us to condemn ourselves. Right.

Rather, I believe he said it to raise an awareness inside of us… Yes, it brings with it a bit of a sting. But it also carries motivation. Once we are convicted of our disobedience, our insides should be so shifted that we single-mindedly seek what is right.

If you love me, you will obey what I command.

So simple, right?

I want to zero in on obedience. But more specifically, obeying the exact words that came out of Jesus Christ’s mouth. Obeying them with all of I’ve got.

Am I saying that those words are more important than the words of Paul or Jeremiah or other parts of the Bible? No, not at all. ALL Scripture is God-breathed(2 Timothy 3:16). No more, no less. Let’s keep that straight.

But for this specific time and place, I want to focus soley on Jesus’s words. So for the next month, I am going to spend one day on each of his commandments (or at least the ones I can find). Praying them, disecting them, then living them.

Each day, I will be posting each specific commandment and my thoughts, for two purposes:

1. Accountability;

2. So that we can do this together. Feel free to comment your own thoughts or ideas. Say what it means to you or how you’ve been convicted.

Until then,

:).

Enough said.

“I’m trading comfort for human life,

and that’s not just murder, its suicide.“

‘This Too Shall Be Made Right’ Derek Webb

Reading this, I can almost feel my heart stop. There’s so much I don’t do. Why? Because I think I already have too much on my plate. It makes sense for me not to do anything else. But let’s place that reason on a pair of scales with perhaps abortion, poverty, and huge parts of the world who have never heard the Gospel on the corresponding side. Comfort vs. Human(eternal..) Life. Which way do the scales fall?

the wedding.

What are your priorities? If I had to name the things that matter to me most, I would like for the list to look something like this: 1. My relationship with Christ Jesus; 2. My family; 3. School and graduating

But when I step back and evaluate myself, my priorities actually end up looking like this: 1. Self; 2. Self; 3. Self. A good portion of my actions don’t go towards my relationship with Christ, but rather they go to myself and what I feel like doing. That doesn’t really seem to match my first priority list, does it?

Maybe my reasoning is a little bit too radical, but if I say that the Lord is my number one priority, then why do I invest so much into other things? Why do I not spend hours and hours of my day solely focused on God to study and know him? I know he deserves it, but why don’t I give it to him? When I step back and look at it from that perspective, it seems like he is not really my top priority, doesn’t it?

You see, I think that there is an unbalance in my life: I spend less time with my Savior than I do with anything else in my life. Maybe I’ll do a 15 minute devo when I first wake up, pray a little bit, and then read through scripture over the course of my day. And that would probably amount to.. perhaps one hour. One hour of my day I am ‘devoting’ myself to God. And what am I doing with the other twenty three hours? Sure, school takes up a big part of my day. As does serving and volunteering in various ministries…

But isn’t God more important than those? Shouldn’t he receive the most of my attention and the most of my time, even more than school or serving?

Again, sometimes I take things too seriously, but this is something I really feel convicted of. There is going to be a Wedding soon. And you and I are going to be in it. In fact, we’re the Bride. Are we going to be ready? Have we been preparing and getting ready for this day?

I’m not sure if we have been adequately preparing. Personally, I’m quite positive that I have not. But we desperately need to. We need to start now. This is going to be the biggest thing in our lives. This is what we are living for. It will sum up everything we have ever done. How do we prepare for it, though?

A bride always wears a beautiful dress, right? And the groom melts just at the sight of her? Well, we know that clothes do not melt the heart of our Groom. What does? What can we do to present ourselves as beautiful to the Lord? What can we, in a sense, dress ourselves in?

The way that I like to think about it is this: We are either doing two things– we are either tearing our “dress”, making it dull and lackluster when we fill our priorities with ’self’; or we are making it more beautiful, making it more white with our purity, and complementing it with precious diamonds and beads through our obedience. And it can only be one of the two. There is no in-between.

That’s a little bit scary, isn’t it? How many times have you ripped our dress? Several times a day, it loses it’s beauty because of me. But I hope to change that. My heart is facing a challenge. I don’t want to ruin the dress. I want to add so much to it. I want to be shining and luminous for the Wedding.

Its going to be pretty difficult, though. I already know that at some times, my sinful nature with temporarily win me over. But the single most important thing I can do is surrender my priorities to my Father. Let him take them and rearrange them from the inside-out. This is something that I cannot accomplish on my own. Only then will I be able to add to our dress, and become stunning in the eyes of Jesus.

I hope that you have been challenged just like I have. I hope you have been convicted of your priorities. I don’t know how much longer I have to prepare. And neither do you. This could be my last day, or even yours. Please, let’s not waste anymore time. We have got to keep Jesus Christ as our top focus. Let’s be beautiful on the wedding day. You keep me accountable, and I will do the same for you.

Jesus, you are more glorious than anything in this world. I cannot wait to see you and to be received by you. Lord, you were faced with everything that we have been faced with, and yet you overcame it, all for the Father. Show us how to do the same. As we seek you, Jesus, give us obedience and purity. We will wait eagerly for the day we will finally meet, but please, give us strength and perseverance as we prepare.

Thanks, Mom.

If you know me, you would know that I enjoy running. I value exercise and think it is pretty important. Sometimes I see people really kicking it up, and I am motivated to do the same and push myself harder. But I have NEVER looked at somebody walking and thought, wow! That person is really working in some cardio. I always saw walking as too easy.

But today I went on a walk with my mom. My mom walks frequently, and she normally does 3-4 miles. And for the whole time she has been walking, I have never even once went with her, or even told her that I was proud and I admired her. But like I said, today, I went out with her. At the beginning, I was teasing my mom a little bit saying that we should run rather than walk, knowing that she would say no. I decided that walking was not good enough for me, and I pulled away from her, and decided to run to the end of our route. While I was running, I started to feel convicted, like I should be spending more time with my mom instead of running ahead. So I decided that I would finish out running until my path crossed with my mom.

When I finally met up with my mom, I was just a little bit winded, but not too bad. I figured that walking the rest of the way would be a breeze. But as I was walking beside my mom, I started to fall behind. And then even more behind. I could not keep up with her. However, it wasn’t like I was tired.. I could have easily ran it home. But when it came to walking, I just physically could not bring myself to walk as fast as her. It was so weird. It was so challenging. I was so confused.. You see, I can outrun my mom for miles, but I could not even walk as fast as her? And not once did my mom appear to be struggling like I was.

I realized something pretty neat through this..

I have never thought walking was a very worthy type of exercise. Its almost like I prided myself and my abilities too much. But as I learned today, I could not even do it. Yes, we were waking pretty fast, but still– the whole entire time, I did not see my mom slow down or start to struggle. She was steady the whole way through. While as for me, I was unsteady–slowing down, then racing back up to keep stride with my mom.

“Give to everyone what you owe them: Pay your taxes and import duties, and give respect and honor to all to whom it is due.” -Romans 13:7

I had really not shown honor to my mom. It was not in a direct and disrespectful way, however, I have never given her any credit for all of the times she has went out and walked. And as I learned today, honor was undoubtedly due. But I was blind to that because of stupid pride.

But let’s step out of my experience with my mom today. Let’s move on to everybody that we come across in general. What have we really done to honor them above and beyond what is expected? Have we valued them? It’s easy to do it superficially. To smile and say great job. But I’m talking about really valuing them– acknowledging that what they are doing is notable and worthy. Seeing the effort and recognizing the heart behind it. And then outwardly appreciating them with all sincerity. Can you see what I am saying? There are too many people that I let walk right past me without letting them know that they are really valuable, and that I appreciate all of the things that I do.

So, thanks Mom. You really are awesome, and I am proud of you for walking, and everything else you do. You’re great. Thanks for showing me my pride. :).

the fringes

Have you ever heard a song, and then later read it in scripture? Or vice versa? For me, I really like it when I come across a verse in a song. Or a song in scripture. I just think its so awesome. :).

Anyways..

He stretches out the north over empty space,
And hangs the earth on nothing,
And how faint a word we even hear of Him,
And yet – our eyes and ears and minds get all the candy.

I sing for grace,
For grace it lets me sing.
And all I’ve ever seen or heard-
Or haven’t seen or heard-
It’s His.
There is no other.
All of this is but the fringes.

And these are but the fringes.
And all the world hinges
On His grace and on His word.
It speaks things into being,
And the spoken things revealing
The glory of our God and King.                                                                                                                      

 Shane & Shane– “Fringes”

I didn’t put up all of the lyrics, but nonetheless, it is a great song with great points. But it gets even better…

“And these are but the outer fringe of his works; how faint the whisper we hear of him! Who then can understand the thunder of his power?”   -Job 26:14

It’s also in scripture.. :).

Just for the sake of context, Job 26 is pretty much only words of adoration coming from Job himself directed God. Job tells of how God is merciful and omniscient. He tells how God created everything from nothing, and continues to sustain it. He tells how God’s power is feared.

But he is much more vivid that I am. Go read it and see. By his words, he builds God up to be more amazing than imaginable.. And then says that these are only the fringes. Every single thing that we think or see of God is only but the fringes. The most magnificent idea or view that we can conceive about God is marginal with how he really is. Isn’t that pretty hard to hold as a concept? Wow. But its great. I’ve heard that before, but now there is some kind of new emphasis and truth to it. I can hardly believe it. I have only seen the fringes of God, and all this time I thought this was it. I thought the view was as good as it gets. But he is so much better. I can’t wait to pass into the heavenlies, just to really see and feel more than the fringes forever. I want to see everything.

God, you are marvelous and magnificent. There is nobody like you. Lord, prepare me for the day when I can bow at your feet amongst all of your splendor. As we seek you, reveal more to us about your ways. I love every single part of you that I can see, and I am eager to see more.

This is the day…

” This is the day that the Lord has made; We will rejoice and be glad in it.”

           –Psalm 118:24

Ah… I love working in the children’s ministry at my church. It is such a privilege to be able to spend time teaching and loving them.. and to be loved back by them in return. It makes the weekend exciting for me. But lately, especially in the particular classroom I serve in, there has been a shortage and inconsistency of volunteers, which makes a room full of 40 kindergarteners a bit crazy. But in the end, God is good, and graces us with his provision– so very rarely do I get overwhelmed or stressed.

However, tonight was different.. I hadn’t eaten all day, and I was running on little sleep.. I felt so weak and empty. At the beginning of the night, I allowed myself to become offended by somebody else’s actions, which added to the condition of my spirit. So, the night continued, and so did my poor state of heart and mind. But after watching the kids and seeing the joy they had in them, I was hit with a verse..

“This is the day that the Lord has made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.”

Man. That hit me hard, too. Its always interesting when God sends his word your way, especially at the times when you need to hear it, but don’t want to. : ) So for me, there was really no denying that I was NOT rejoicing in the day that merciful Jesus had privileged me with. And nor was I glad. I was not reflecting thankfulness, and after a quick session with God, it was great.. I was not hungry and I had energy. But more than that, my heart was different. I let go of the offense I was holding, and the chaos became quiet. I was able to become a friend to the children again, and give them the love that they should recieve. 

In every situation, it is what it is, and no matter what, GOD IS GOOD. Its easy to say during a good moment, but harder to believe if you are like how I was tonight. No matter what, we should rejoice and be glad and honor God with our thankfulness. My gaze fell tonight, and it turned to focus on me, rather than the day that the Lord made, and the children whom he made for me to love and teach.

The verse that I received tonight is such a common and simple verse. But every word of it is so important. I want to encourage you so that you don’t potentially waste valuable time like I almost did. Be glad today.. What glory can be brought to the Lord do if you are offended or upset? When we are like this, Satan wins over our actions. This is a day we don’t deserve to live. Make the best of it of every situation. Rejoice and be glad, no matter what happens. God is good in everything.

.. but they will never turn around..

“Many men will drink the Rain, then turn and thank the clouds.

Many men will hear Your voice, but they will never turn around.”- I Will Not Forget You

 

Sang by one of my favorites– 100 Portraits/Waterdeep. I think those words describe perfectly the condition of the world and our culture. Deaf and blind.

“..since what may be known about God is plain to them,  because God has made it plain to them. 20| For since the creation of the world, God’s invisible qualities–his eternal power and divine nature–have been clearly seen, being understood by what has been made, so that men are without excuse.” Romans 1:19-20

This brings up a few questions in me.

I was backpacking this summer, and I was really drained after climbing over 10 miles with a pack as big as me riding on my back. But then after the whole day of hiking, we came to the clearing where you could see for miles and miles. It was incredible. One of the most amazing things I’ve seen, and it refreshed me completely and brought me new energy. I climbed up on a rock, and it was almost like standing right on the top of the moutain. It was a visual confirmation of God’s magnificence and power. It was awesome.

According to Paul, up on that rock, one would be left with no excuse. I agree.

But what is it that keeps people from recognizing God through creation? He is not limited to mountains… Just take a look at sunrises and newborns and the ocean.

That crushing feeling that I felt resonating through my chest when I looked off from the mountain, does everybody feel it?

If not, then what excactly do they feel?

This is so hard to get a grip on.. It doesn’t settle on my heart and makes my stomache ache. What do you think? What is it that keeps people from experiencing God?

“For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened.” -verse 21

The Isaiah Fast

“4|Your fasting ends in quarreling and strife, and with striking each other with wicked fists.You cannot fast as you do today and expect your voice to be heard on high.

5|Is this the kind of fast I have chosen, only a day for a man to humble himself? Is it only for bowing one’s head like a reed and for lying on sackcloth and ashes? Is this what you call a fast, a day acceptable to the Lord?

6|Is this not the kind of fast I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke?

7|Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter– when you see the naked, to clothe him, and to not turn away your own flesh and blood.” — Isaiah 58:4-7

I don’t even know where to go with this. What does this mean? How can I become this? Is it to be taken literally or in some other context? What exactly did Isaiah fast? What do YOU think?

Verse ten… “and if you spend yourselves on behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday.”

what would we look like?

My intent for this blog is to relay the things that move me to other people. I want to make an attempt to get other people to understand what I wrestle with in my heart, so they can wrestle too. And most of those tough things come to me through songs and scripture [hence the title of this blog]. So here comes my first blog..

“..Break my heart for what breaks Yours..” Hosanna– Hillsong

One of my most favorite songs. To me, those words are pretty powerful. Break my heart for what breaks Yours. Wow. What breaks a holy God’s heart? God made everybody with all of the love in the world times infinity. It broke his heart when he saw the very first man and woman fall into Satan. It broke his heart to see Cain kill his brother. It broke his heart to see the immorality of Sodom and Gomorrah. It broke his heart to see his very own people worship a golden calf. It broke his heart to see his very own creation which he was crazy in love continue to fall into sin, losing sight of him. So what did he do?? Sacrifice. God sent his only son he had away, knowing that he would be murdered for us. All of that just to save his creation who made the choice themselves to sin. He saw the lost, and it broke his heart, so he made a sacrifice. Jesus Christ willingly made that sacrifice.

So what breaks God’s heart? How about the millions and millions of people that he created who deny his very existence. How about when we spend money on things we don’t need when we have hungry brothers and sisters. How about when we sit in our comfy middle class homes, forgetting about those who are being tortured and oppressed for their love for Jesus Christ. How about when we sit idle, doing things that bring no glory to God. How about when we know that there are people who need his love, yet we are not doing every single thing possible to show them that love??

Break our hearts for what breaks Yours.

Do those things break our hearts? I can hardly sing that song without those thoughts in my mind. And it kills me too. I know that I do not allow all of the things that break God’s heart to break mine. But what would I look like if they did? What would you look like? If we allowed things to break our hearts like they did God’s, we would do the same as him. Sacrifice. Our sacrifice will never come close to comparing to his. But I have no doubt it would make a difference. We would be filled with such a passion. We would become selfless and hungry for others to experience God. We would become more intentional. And no matter what we are sacrificing now, it can always be increased. If we made those words the prayer on our heart, think of what he could do with us. Think of how we could be changed. What would we look like? How much more glory could we bring to him?

God, break our hearts. Break them for what breaks yours. Strengthen our convictions. Jesus make us like you. Make us ignorant to everything but your heart. Show us how.